Reptile Dysfunction

Dear Dr. Oblivioso,

I have been diagnosed with erectile dysfunction, and though the doctors
don't know what's causing it, they want to try some different medications first.
I'm a little scared, because this is my little buddy we're dealing with here,
and I was wondering if you can tell me about some of the medications and what to
watch for?

Sincerely,
Limp Biscuit

Dear Biscuit,

Erectile dysfunction is something which is a difficult subject for most men because of the psychological implications of not being able to "get it up" somehow equating to not being as much of a man. While certainly it is true that an inability to gain an erection destroys your manhood, it is sometghing that affects a large number of men (as shown by the popularity of drugs such as Viagra^®, Levitra^®, and Cialis^®.
Viagra seems to be the most popular, and it seems to work more on the desire side of things. Reports are that it makes the "tingly" feeling more tingly, if that helps at all. Levitra seems to work more on the actual erectile function, the actual underlying "plumbing" as it were. Cialis looks to be a lot like Viagra, but with a longer half-life (17 hours compared to 4).
Because I am still completely a man, I do not have any firsthand experience with any of the erectile dysfunction medications, but I have heard that Viagra tends to enhance the pleasure of the orgasm itself, while Levitra tends to provide for longer erections. Not longer as in size, longer as in time. There are also several reports that Viagra also increases the pleasure of the orgasm for women as well, though I have had no need to explore this avenue of intellectual curiosity.
There are some possible side effects, including dizziness, drop in blood pressure, possible nausea, headaches and general malaise. These you should discuss with your doctor. Also, be aware that most insurance companies don't co-pay for ED medications, which are expensive (running about $10 to $15 per dose).
There are also several nonprescription "erectile enhancement" medications available through various online sources, most notably from the TV commercials is Enzyte. The TV commercials are designed to make you think that you will get a larger, stronger penis by taking these pills, but the facts are that they do nothing except sign you up for recurring charges on your credit card bill. This is how they afford television commercials in the first place.
If none of these medications works for you, there are other (more drastic) procedures that can be done, but they usually require a specialist known as a urologist to handle.
In short, your penis defines your worth as a man, and you should take care of it in any way possible, not to mention that erectile dysfunction is also a symptom of certain heart conditions. Definitely discuss this with your doctor.